When you connect by playing a fixed part in a fixed sum of the parts

You are taught by school and your parents to connect by finding your part to play in this world.

When you connect by playing a fixed part, in a fixed sum of the parts, you will expect everyone to fulfill their parts so that everyone can benefit from the overall outcome. While this may seem like a connection, it is the bare minimum of what is possible. It is a comfort zone. Although having something to aim for makes this arrangement more bearable, it does not eliminate the feeling of stagnation.

Moreover, it drives away those prepared to invest in a connection that goes beyond mere functionality. For example, if someone hesitates or only partially commits to the part assigned to them, you might perceive them as selfish for hindering access to the collective benefit. If someone expresses concerns about their part or the impact of the sum of the parts, you are likely to dismiss their input or reject them. If they attempt to propose an alternative structure, you may view them as controlling. It maybe possible for you to become so conditioned by playing a fixed part in a fix sum of the parts that any uncertainty triggers anxiety.

It hurts to be deselected from playing a fix part in someone’s fixed sum of the parts. Do you risk rejection again and try get another part? You can also develop your own way of making sense of the world. Your own fixed set of parts. You tell yourself to remain open to new ideas provide their is evidence you can understand. You connect to those who are prepared to align their thinking with you. You build yourself another comfort zone.

To escape this stagnation, consider embracing the concept of Gestalt. By loosening the ties between interconnected parts, you allow connections that create something greater than the sum of the less fixed parts. When the constraints of perfection are lifted, a pathway for continuous improvement opens up.